Happiness Tips

With a new school year just around the corner, we’re about to begin our annual “Back-to-School Dinners” where we plan an evening out with each kid to get him locked and loaded for the upcoming school year. It’s like the coach having a one-on-one (or in our case, a two-on-one) with each player before the start of the season.

Our guys always look forward to their back-to-school dinners. They love the opportunity to hang out with us alone and have our undivided attention, and we really enjoy hearing what each one has to say. They’re always at their most mature and interesting when they’re by themselves, and one of my favorite things is taking the time to appreciate each…

Category: Happiness Tips

Every Monday, I share a family happiness tip—something that works for our family, that you might want to try with your own.

This week’s tip is to make a “positive mealtime” rule—no one is allowed to gripe or argue. Many days, meals are the only times when everyone (or nearly everyone) is together—and the prevailing mood can set the tone for family interactions for hours, if not days, to come. Instead of focusing on what’s wrong, consciously discuss good things that have happened, and what you’re all looking forward to doing in the future.

Believe me, I know what it’s like to sit down at the table and be tempted to complain about a frustrating day at work or a project…

Category: Happiness Tips

Instead of breaking the bank to shower your kids with material things this holiday season, why not give them the gift of a meaningful experience instead? Time spent together – not a new video game system or wardrobe – will truly stick with them and shape their worldviews. Here are some ideas to get you started: 1. Choose an event to attend together. Get a schedule of local holiday-themed concerts, plays, parades, shows, and other events, and choose a few to attend as a family. Your kids (and you!) will enjoy counting down to these outings, and you’ll have an even better time attending them. Plus, everyone will remember the live performance of White Christmas or the holiday-themed magic show much…

Category: Happiness Tips

If you’re trying to cram “˜the holidays’ and all that they entail and cost into only a few weeks, you’re bound to be robbing those around you of joy instead of giving it to them. This year, commit to prioritizing and planning purposefully…and start doing it now! As 2011 draws to a close, you might just find that you’ve created the meaningful holiday season you’d just about given up on ever having.

Over the past couple of days, we’ve shared tips and suggestions for taking the stress out of this holiday season. First, we shared four tips for making sure your holiday spending doesn’t break the bank. Next, we offered five ways to manage your time more efficiently…

Category: Happiness Tips

Have holidays past left you feeling drained and disappointed – in spite of your best intentions for a Norman Rockwell-esque celebration with your family? You’re not alone. In fact, you’re part of the (unfortunate) norm. Not to worry. Here are some simple steps that your family can take to get back the holiday you’ve always wanted and make your “merry” more meaningful this year.

There are three major areas where most families get themselves into trouble around the holidays: finances, time management, and dealing with family and kids. Yesterday, we tackled finances with four tips to keep your holiday spending in check. Today, it’s all about managing your time. Part Two: Time Management 5. Be realistic. Unless you actually have Santa’s…

Category: Happiness Tips

If you’re like most American families, the approach of the holiday season brings with it the anticipation of a month filled with family togetherness and merry memory making – in other words, the holidays as you’ve always imagined them. As each new holiday season arrives, you promise yourself that you won’t repeat the mistakes made in years past: guilt from overspending, exhaustion from overbooking, or the constant frustration over kids who misbehave and act ungrateful. Every year you pledge, “This is the year we’re going to do things differently.” And yet, things always seem to stay the same.

Don’t despair. It is possible to consciously create the holiday you want…if you make your list early and check it twice. The…

Category: Happiness Tips

It’s August, and around here that means that we’ve started our series of “Back-to-School Dinners.” To get the kids ready to return to school, we plan an evening out with each one where we get the chance to talk to him alone, he gets to hang out with us and have our undivided attention, and we get him locked and loaded for the upcoming school year. It’s like the coach having a one-on-one (or in our case, a two-on-one) with each player before the start of the season.

We do our back-to-school pep talks over dinner, but you could do it over breakfast or lunch or ice cream—or just as a special “meeting” on the back porch…

Category: Happiness Tips

Actor and entrepreneur John Ratzenberger (yup, Cliff Clavin) shared some wisdom last Sunday in his commencement address to Providence College’s Class of 2011. My cousin, who had brought greetings to the graduates in her role as president of PC’s National Alumni Association, sent along the three-hour video of the graduation exercises. I was curious about Ratzenberger’s remarks, so I fast-forwarded through the diploma ceremony, and his message resonated with me enough that I decided to share an excerpt. (For his full remarks, forward to 2hr 33min) It echoes the chapter on “Resilience & Accountability” I wrote inLetters From Home.

All words are by John Ratzenberger, and transcribed to the best of my (limited!) ability:

“When I…

Category: Happiness Tips

Q: How do you teach kids to disagree agreeably?

—Michelle B.

A: Great question, Michelle.

The best way is to model the art of healthy conflict to your kids—at home and in public. Getting into disagreements from time to time is part of life, but outright fights don’t have to be. Try to show patience and let others get their whole point out instead of interrupting. Try not to raise your voice or use derogatory or hurtful language. For example, hear your spouse out when you disagree and reply without raising your voice. Strive for direct communication instead of passive-aggressive manipulation. These communication strategies will foster mutual respect and help create authentic relationships—inside and outside of your home. And…

Category: Happiness Tips

Q: My kids are glad to help out around the house, but they get discouraged if they see me turning around and kind of “re-doing” what they did because it wasn’t good or thorough enough. So what’s the answer? Is it better to praise my kids for what they were able to do rather than make them feel bad because they didn’t do it exactly right?

—Leah S.

A: Hi, Leah. Thanks for the question!

The bottom line: don’t make the mistake of re-doing their work. If you signal to your kids that their work wasn’t good enough, they’ll quickly grow discouraged and as a result they won’t bother to learn how to do the task properly and will rely…

Category: Happiness Tips